A Second Chance Reflection
During our date night, Thammie and I decided to watch ‘A Second Chance”, one of the highest grossing Filipino film this year. I think most Filipinos already know the synopsis of the movie.
Second Chance takes on a different angle from most love stories full of “kilig moments” and shows to us a side of marriage that people experience. During the movie, I was tempted to take down notes of lessons and reflections I learned watching the movie since millions of Filipinos have watched the movie and felt in love again after (hopefully, most choosing to fight for their marriage after).
So here are some lessons I’ve learned:
- No such thing as the 7 year itch.
Success in marriage is never about passing a certain year mark. We have seen couples who started well and past the 7 year mark and still end up miserable and ultimately end their marriage.
What keeps the marriage strong is still first and foremost understanding that marriage is a covenant. It is never just a contract. For better or for worst, in sickness and in health, till death do us part. In the case of Popoy and Basha – till debt do us part.
Walang “what if” but rather “what is”. It is a lifelong commitment to one person for the rest of your life – till death.
This kind of marriage can only be achieved if one knows and experiences the unconditional love and grace of God. Selfish people would have a hard time in marriage. Those who enter it for their own selfish reason – might not make it through till the end unless God intervenes.
2. Open up to your spouse.
The two hour movie could have ended early if the husband just learned to open up and be vulnerable to his wife.
The line, “ayaw kong mag-alala ka kaya di ko sinabi” is often a line that is abused by men to guard their ego and pride.
God said in Genesis, “It is not good for man to be alone, I will make a helper suitable for him.” The helper mentioned is Scripture ay hindi yaya kung hindi partner sa buhay. Do you have a Basha in your life?
3. Don’t let ambition and love of money ruin your marriage.
We all have hopes, dreams and aspiration to live the life being marketed at us. We think having a bigger house and a higher income would make things better – not necessarily.
Every couple talks about their desires before the wedding day. They laugh, dream and hope. They made it a point to love each other whether the desire would be achieved or not. But something happens when the couple says I do. Desires become expectations. And when desire turns into expectations the dynamic of the relationship changes. It is no longer about appreciating your partner – it is expecting. It becomes a debt- debtor relationship. When expectations go beyond what is expected of the Bible – it becomes burdensome.
Ambitions driven by greed and lust for power and prestige destroys marriages. Some of the happiest couples I know are contented people. The thing is you can’t find contentment in the things of this world.
A loving, faithful spouse, kids who are eager to see you home, a good shelter and food to eat are things that should make us happy.